Women: Mothers and Daughters

What will our daughters think of us as they become grandmothers? Will they judge us harshly for our decisions to pursue education? employment? to seek happiness even at the cost of divorcing their fathers? Will they seek to understand their collective mother? Will they emulate? Will they find their relationship ills exacerbated by their own fears ~abandonment, strength, weakness, power-struggles, “where do I fit in if my husband is no longer charged with bread winning”?

These feelings, internalized by our daughters, where will they lead our granddaughters? Their daughters…? The cycle fascinates me. Just as technology changes now in nano-seconds and faster, the human race is changing. I am purposely not using the word “evolving” here; I want not to pass judgment as to the forward or backward motion of our species. I attempt to simply view what is, with no decision as to whether or not it is progress. I’m “copping-out.” I’m specifically using non-judgment as an excuse to not rant or write of my bias. There is no going, “out on a limb” for me. I choose the safety of the sidelines as I watch…I ponder.

And still, I stand now in wonder, not of the question of, “what will our daughters think of us as they become grandmothers,” but now of the immediate here and now. What do our daughters think of us? What blames are placed upon us consciously, and further, in the recesses and beyond? Are we draped in blame for social ills and broken homes and failed relationships and inflation and even global warming, periods and hysterectomies…?

Hmmm….

I’ll ponder this in silence of course; keep my thoughts, questions and even those deeply camouflaged feelings of doubt, and yes, guilt, to myself. I’ll go about my life as I do…oblivious that I could be the cause of any ills, personal, of offspring, or on a global scale; makes no difference. I’m not to blame. I’ve only me to raise now. The other days are long gone and filled, or empty; “they are,” as it is said, “what they are.”

And I am exonerated.