Why are Women Still So Desperate to Have Babies?

April 24, 2011 by Bess Simcock  
Published in Women

It’s the 21st Century and still so many women are desperate to get married and have babies. When there are are so many better things we can do, why do we kid ourselves that contributing to global overpopulation is actually making a positive contribution?

I live with two single women, one in her late twenties and the other in her mid-thirties. Last weekend we had a BBQ. Each housemate invited a few of her friends and afterward a big group of us all went out of the town. At first it was fun; just talking, drinking and dancing and then after a while as the night drew on, the focus turned to finding a man. Well, there’s nothing unusual about that, but as the group got dragged from one venue to another, when it was decided that there were no decent men there, the novelty started to wear thin.

What was the big deal anyway? You don’t have to pick up to have a good night. I thought my friends were making a too bigger deal of it, and then finally as we waited outside the last club waiting a ride home; one women suddenly burst into tears….she was 31, single and desperately wanted to settle down and start a family.

I’ve just turned 29, finally have a great man, a rewarding job and quite frankly couldn’t think of anything worse. What’s more I can’t understand why in the 21st Century, when they are countless opportunities for women to achieve great things, so many of us still feel like we need to breed to validate our existence. I mean, every organism does it; you don’t even need a brain to have a child, and there are so many costs these days associated with being a parent.

What really does it for me is that so many people are still under the misassumption that having a child is actually making a positive contribution to the world. In reality, however, there are now more than 7 billion people on the planet, and as the population continues to increase: other species of plants and animals become extinct, forests and wetlands are lost, and the oceans and atmosphere are becoming more polluted. The fact is that we are slowly suffocating the Earth.

 It may sound harsh, but if you have children, you are more directly contributing to these problems than people who don’t.  Many studies have shown that children usually live similar lifestyles to their parents and thus have similar ecological footprints so if you have children take your footprint and double it for one child; triple it for two and so on….

Many misguided greenies look down on single people who live alone, have no children, drive or fly long distances, don’t recycle etc. but at least to some extent the impact of this type of lifestyle on the environment dies when the people do. If you’re a parent then the damaging consequences of your life choices are duplicated very quickly and are likely to go on long after you’re dead.

Many well-known conservationists have said: let’s slow down consumption of material things. How much do we really need?  But I’m not aware of anyone who had asked the controversial question of: there’s more than 7 billion people now, how many more of us do we really need? And if the answer is in the negative then what are we going to do about it?

Part of the answer has to be education, and not just the education of women in developing countries but education of our own. We need to say to western women: hey, there are so many things you can do with your life. You don’t need to have children to feel like a real woman, and it’s actually better for the world if you don’t. Women without children should be praised and respected for embracing liberty and letting our heads rather than our hormones rule our lives.

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