Reasons Why She Wont Commit Just Yet
November 9, 2010 by Jimmy Shilaho
Published in Women
You run to her with a smile on your face, ready to propose but she wipes that stupid smile away. She is not ready to commit! Why would any woman turn down a proposal, why would she run away from commitment? Here are some possible reasons for her lack of commitment.
Your girlfriend or woman friend keeps waiting for that day when you will propose. For her, engagement and that big wedding are everything she ever dreamt of. She counts the days with bated breath, waiting, waiting and waiting even more for the day you will go down on one knee and pop the question. If you thought the answer will always be yes, well think again for there are reasons why she may not commit just yet.
- She is seeing another man – So you think you are God’s gift to women and take them for granted, well your woman could be seeing another man, hence the reason for her hesitation. Her no will wipe away the smile from your face but if you want to preserve some dignity, read the signs and don’t insist.
- She doesn’t know you – Unlike men who will bed anything that wears a blouse, most women take their time before committing. Turning down your proposal may mean she needs more time to know you, to understand the kind of man you are and not necessarily rejection.
- You are poor – No woman will ever tell you to your face how your poverty or near poverty irks her, but it surely does. While money may not mean the world, love can not put food on the table. If your pockets are forever empty, your woman needs to know that you have the ambition, the will to succeed despite your present financial challenges.
- She loves her space – Not every woman longs for the kind of leash that marriage purports. Some women love their cake but would want to eat it too. Don’t be surprised if she turns you down for this reason but hangs around for longer for modern career women often hesitate when the idea of marriage is flaunted in their faces.
- She still loves her ex – Hmmmmmh, you came onto the scene and picked up the pieces but she never got over her ex and still hopes he will come back and beg her forgiveness. While you may be the best thing that ever happened to her since the break up, she may not commit until she is sure her ex has moved on and won’t be available in the near future.
Like they say, everyone is unique but women are even more unpredictable. While her reasons may never be revealed, the five mentioned in this article could be good guesses.
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November 9th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
good post
November 9th, 2010 at 2:41 pm
nice one
November 9th, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Yes, Doc. This is very true.
His kids won’t accept anyone else for their dad. There’s always that possibility. I guess once they get to know you and see that you are not there to replace their mother, then it’s okay. This is another reason that I wanted to add.
November 9th, 2010 at 3:06 pm
Woman = WOE MAN!!!
Women play hard to get, men need to read between the lines and get the girl, if he wants her bad. Wait for her if she is worth it, after all she is human too.
Lets just put it this way, women, sensible versions, tend to observe and heal their past to give the best to the one who is going to be their present. When the past clouds their mind, they find that they cannot love without remorse or guilt in their heart and actually create a barrier to love that formulates a judgement in the man whom she is dating.
With regard to money, Hmmm!! A well coined observation. No one likes people with no goal and ambition in life, both men and women alike. Love doesn\’t put food on the table but it helps build a synergy that creates avenues to achieve but not if the goal is onesided.
Women of today don\’t want marriage as they are expensiive too when they end, for some, not all. They spell commitment no doubt, and the happily ever after scenerio but past experiences, upbringing etc. do give them an opinion on how they view marriage to be. Think from their point of view, for example: my mum was hit by dad when I was a child. I am an adult now, my brain tells me, men hit women in marriages, they control them etc. I never want to marry. Its a cycle as women at times choose the replicas of their fathers and history repeats itself. It all boils down to the conditioning of the mind through observation. Fear of the unknown due to past experiences.
Marriage is not all here comes the bride, all dressed in white but more of the intermingling of the mind, body and soul with or without ring. Rings are for the social acceptance and legal binding to curb gregarious behaviour which is inherent in any animal as they are animals. So if she has feelings for her ex, she will take time to let go, if she wants to, and then come to you. Or, there may be times she does come to you before that but you don\’t see the signs and turn away till a lot later stage in time. Not all women voice their opinions, they drop hints. Observe body language not words.
The ex, is a hard topic, for there are emotions attached and if the emotions gave rise to an offspring bigger attachment with a child needs a father scenerio.
But be assured when they keep coming back to you and talking to you, it means they are still interested in you and want to keep it going.
Women are not unpredictable, they are more complex when compared to men. It takes patience to really get to know them and no two women are the same although they have the same physical attributes. They are all DIFFERENT.
Well thought of and carefully crafted summarised observation.
Party Animal says it like it is.
November 9th, 2010 at 3:15 pm
there should be some other reasons too as no reason fits well to my girl and she just wont commit
so what can the reason beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
November 9th, 2010 at 3:39 pm
Suhail, like I said, women are not only unique but unpredictable as well. Figure out the reason or some other man will figure it out for you.
November 9th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
Its a waste of time if you still looking for someone with any of these reasons.
November 9th, 2010 at 7:04 pm
I’m glad I don’t have to worry over these things Leo… life’s a gas ha ha ha… cheers
November 9th, 2010 at 9:55 pm
Nice Share.
November 9th, 2010 at 10:31 pm
You will never know for sure,
November 10th, 2010 at 12:00 am
If I have to make my own list I will put “You are poor” in the top reason. lol.
November 10th, 2010 at 12:08 am
Gr8 list…we women are majority of the times unpredictable is what men folks think; i disagree here.
November 10th, 2010 at 1:20 am
wonderful analysis. Very true, love is the source of life, but not the source of food
November 10th, 2010 at 3:33 am
One of the main reasons a woman will not commit to a man that is in love with her is that times have changed and the reasons for marriage is not the same.
For instance back in the day woman married so as to have a provider and protector, she usually moved straight from her parents house to her husbands bed. He provided shelter, food, clothing, and a safe environment to raise children.
Now fast forward to present day, woman now are buying homes alone, earning top salaries in their careers, and having children through artificial insemination.
They have bonded with other successful woman and have developed strong friendships, so basically.
The only thing that a woman would need a man for now a days is for sex and if she can have it from more than one guy, then she does not need to settle down or tied down.
of course this is a generalization and each case or circumstance is different as well as many womens reasoning for fear of commitment is different.
November 10th, 2010 at 5:52 am
Very valid reasons. I agree 100% with Raj’s comment too – ”Love is the source of life, but not the source of food”. It’s been my experience that ”love” usually stops a womans brain from working. I’m glad to see from your article Jimmy that there are many women that do – hesitate. After all – a marriage commitment should be for life.
November 10th, 2010 at 6:30 am
Good work. I love reading this one. Thanks for sharing!
November 10th, 2010 at 9:20 am
There are many reasons why some women won’t commit. Some will say why if you ask them.
November 10th, 2010 at 10:49 am
ya, many reasons, some may still want to “look see look see” first, secure you first, but at the same time look out, in case anyone better then you then release you…..this is happening to some people, of course if this happen, usually the relationship is shaky.
You always write interesting topics, including this.
November 10th, 2010 at 3:26 pm
Good to read an article by a man interested in the reasoning of some women. Men should not always take rejection personally. Good points here. Some women may even be in love but afraid of love iteslf. I agree we can be awfully unpredictable.
November 10th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
that is true what minister marlene brought up, a woman could be deeply in love with a man but due to fear of being hurt or abandoned she will not commit to him.
She wants to be sure that he will stay with her through thick and thin and that is a guarantee no one can provide.
The fear of what “MIGHT” happen is a sure killer of commitment.
November 11th, 2010 at 5:36 am
Interesting topic. I think there is one more reason. For some women, they love their men, but they believed that they will be treated better if they are girlfriends, not wives. Thanks for sharing.
November 11th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
As usual, very good article. Number five is so true for many…I’m glad those days are over.
November 14th, 2010 at 10:12 am
Nice share.
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