Characteristics of Domestic Violence in Marriage
Domestic violence is very common in intimate relationships.This article presents some of the major characteristics of domestic violence.
Domestic violence in intimate relationships often involves men abusing their female partners and it occurs in various forms.It occurs regardless of age, race or economic status and the forms it may take include coercion,threats,intimidation,isolation,emotional,sexual and physical abuses.
No one deserves to be abused.
An abuser tends to exert power and control over his partner. Some people believe that domestic violence results from anger but it is not.It is about trying to instill fear and wanting to have power and control in a relationship. A batterer may also resort to physical violence such as kicking,shoving,slapping etc. He may also use sexual violence such as forcing his partner to have sexual intercourse with him against her will or consent.
In an abusive relationship,tactics deployed by an abuser to gain power and control over the other include:
The abuser exercises total and absolute control over the finances and refuses to share money or will not allow the partner to work outside the home.This is to ensure total dependence on him by the abused mate.
The abuser uses put downs,insults,criticisms to make the abused mate feel bad about himself/herself.
This involves using certain looks,actions and gestures to instill fear in the other other person.
This involves limiting contacts with friends and family,not allowing the victim to go to work or school,controlling the victim’s social activities/social events,tracking her time and whereabouts etc.
The abuser makes all the major decisions in the relationship,is in charge of domestic and social life and treats the partner as a servant or possession.
Domestic violence usually starts subtly.The abuser may start with criticizing the appearance of the other or may be unreasonably jealous.Gradually this becomes frequent and eventually assumes a life threatening dimension.
Major characteristics include the following:
- Been hit,kicked,shoved or threatened with violence
-Having no choice about how to spend one’s time,where to go or what to wear etc.
-Being falsely accused of what one did or did not do
-Must ask the abuser partner for permission to make everyday decisions
-Submitting to sex or engaging in sexual acts against one’s will
-Accepting the abuser’s decisions out of fear of ensuing anger
-Accused of being unfaithful