The Love Roster

In honour of all of the thankless individuals that have supported me in the past year, I thought I might pay homage to those I love. Not the men/boys who have capriciously held my heart throughout my life, (perhaps on another day) for they have come and gone although what they have taken and left behind as souvenirs is ever relevant and has been integral in creating the woman that I have and with any luck, may eventually become.

Rather I dedicate this to those who are the ongoing blessings in my life at this very time.

The Mini-Me’s

These are the 2 most glorious creatures on the face of the planet, and I have successfully navigated opposing opinions of various teachers, daycare workers, and other parents to champion that claim. When at 5, my oldest daughter (now almost 17) declared herself to be the “Princess of Sarcasm”, differing to me as the Queen, I thought “Hmmm, yes that’s true. That you have mastered irony and sarcasm at your age, I am truly humbled in your brilliance. Now, if you can only master the art of discretion for its appropriate use, we will all suffer no further embarrassment.” That my fluctuating stress levels have absolutely no affect on the continuous optimism and endless good cheer of my youngest daughter (a 15 year old heartbreaker), I am impressed, relieved and somewhat envious. That everyday they bring to my life such joy, inspiration and ground me to what is truly valuable in this bad-ass world of bullshit, I recognize that I am one of the luckiest humans alive and yet, I realize I can take no credit. They are rockin’ like a hurricane, in spite of me.

The Girlz in da Hood

I have spent more hours spewing coffee through my nasal passages and choking on vodka martinis because I have succumbed to uncontrollable fits of laughter in the numerous occasions in which we have dissected our lives. I have said it before but without these beautiful, blunt, brilliant, bold women I could not even fathom having survived the trials and tribulations of single parenting teenagers, ex-husbands, current lovers, grief, menopause, self-employment and financial stress. We have debated and mocked the improbability that we will ever raise ourselves to be fit but we will rise to any challenge to do it for our kids. We have saved each other the trouble of squandering our time on nightclubs, macho idiots, badly conceived movies and reality TV, if only because the value of spending that time in each other’s company is simply so much more precious. They are the true hereos in a world so replete with the false gods of materialism and pop culture. Plus they’re absolutely stunning hotties with great clothes that I can borrow!

The Distant Ones

Here are the people across the years and miles who constantly manifest in all my memories and stories and photo albums and travels, whose lives have forked into different cities, paths, philosophies. Their cards and emails and phone calls actually make me high. To know I’ve touched these lives and still often feel them  reaching over distances to touch mine is my wealth, the validation of all I’ve done and been and learned…that which was beautiful and meaningful, as well as that which was hideous and superficial. They are the proof, the value, the meaning of change and they have been my roadmap to the present. I am infinitely grateful that they never let me become too lost. And mostly, I appreciate that they all have internet access.

My Men Friends

The funny guys, the cool guys, the playboys, the hopeless romantics. Can I calculate the value of insight they’ve given me into the male mind, the myths they’ve dispelled, the truths they’ve exemplified? I doubt it. Can I love them in spite of it? With relish!  I’ve given them my food, my beer, my ear, my sofa and unwisely on occasion, the use of my bathroom, and they have returned it with warm, protective loyalty and affection. They’ve played the role of friend in that uniquely unconditionally accepting way that only men can play it. Not to mention that they’ve taught me how to belch and fart my way to popularity.

The Italians

That would be my family…my parents, my siblings, and every aunt, uncle and cousin three times removed down the line.  I do see as many as possible at all of the traditional family events…weddings, christenings, and sometimes, sadly, funerals now as I get older.  The passion of their emotion and the rich, open way they celebrate when we are all together is forever engraved upon my heart.  The noise, the food, the music, the love are all pieces of who I am…I love to feed everyone and my emotions are seldom expressed in a retiring fashion.  I laugh with abandon and smolder when I am angry, and sometimes, just sometimes, I hold an unreasonable grudge.

To all of these, I pledge my undying loyalty, love and gratitude for infusing my life without pretense and ensuring that I always feel that I am truly blessed.