You’re Not Alone

March 20, 2012 by lynnshamrock  
Published in Friendship

This is about how you can feel alone even when you’re around a lot of people. I’ve learned that I’m not the only one that feels this way. I explore ways to ease the loneliness.

I live in a big household.  I am married, have 3 children, and we all live with my mother in law and my husband’s sister.  So, in this big household of people, how is it possible I still feel alone?  I think there are a number of reasons for this.  One of those reasons is the fact that I struggle with depression.  Depression can cause me to feel this way alot.  I think another reason for this is basically because I have a yearning for female friendships that can understand and relate with me. 

In high school, I wasn’t very popular because I was quite shy.  But, I did have quite a few close friends that I would spend time with.  Unfortunately, as soon as a person meets someone, gets married, and has children, life gets extremely busy and one’s social life gets forgotten about.  This ultimately leads to loneliness and one may feel withdrawn.  This can also lead to extreme depression. So, my first pointer in this is to set a time at least once a week to spend time with friends.  It really doesn’t matter what you do.  Even if it’s just spending time with each other at that friend’s house or your house, you’re still getting that social interaction.   Even spending time with one friend once a week can lift spirits. 

I spent some time with a friend last week that I’ve known for 15 years.  That was really nice.  It lifted my spirits and it was alot of fun interacting with a friend that I don’t see often.  We sat and talked over ice cream in the park.  As we talked, I realized something.  I realized for the first time in a long time that I wasn’t alone in feeling the way I feel.  I realized that many women feel the same way I do.  They tend to feel alone when they don’t have social interaction with friends too.  Many women put so much energy into their children and their household that they forget about themselves.  So, my second pointer is to realize that you are not alone.  Many other people feel the same way you do.  We just need to go out there and discover that for ourselves by meeting with other women like us.

Some women don’t have any friends for whatever reasons.  Maybe their friends all moved away.  Or, maybe their friends have extremely busy lives and can’t get together to do something.  Or, maybe they live in a new state where they don’t know anyone.  Or, maybe they have lost touch with all their friends and don’t know how to get back in touch.  My advice to those people are to find some new friends.  That’s easier said than done for some.  But, all we can do is try.  Get involved in a church group and start talking to women that look interesting.  Another thing that we can do is find playgroups to take our kids to.  One other thing we can do is find a support group with other women involved and start interacting with them.  Once you meet a good friend, there will be a lot of relief because that friendship could last a lifetime.  There’s one very important thing to remember in all this: you are not alone!

Friendship 7 (Photo credit: NASA on The Commons)

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2 Responses to “You’re Not Alone”
  1. eileenaulia Says:

    we are not alone many people love us when we love them

  2. afaceristonline Says:

    very interesting post .thanks for share

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