Dealing with Mr. Unpredictable

June 11, 2010 by CRYSTAL EVANS  
Published in Relationships

Are you dating one of those men that you cannot add a label to? You are not sure if he is a narcissist or simply emotionally unavailable. You are often confused by the numerous mixed-messages he sends you. He can be intimate, loving and charming one minute and the next he is distant, aloof and inattentive.

    Are you dating one of those men that you cannot add a label to? You are not sure if he is a narcissist or simply emotionally unavailable. You are often confused by the numerous mixed-messages he sends you. He can be intimate, loving and charming one minute and the next he is distant, aloof and inattentive.

When he is intimate, you do not know if he means it or he is faking intimacy to get sex. The man is unpredictable. He may drop off the face of the earth for weeks on end then suddenly remerge for a sexual experience and disappears again.  How does a woman deal with a man like that?

       If you don’t have a problem being the fall back girl for sex then you may continue being friend with and waiting in the wings for this man. However if you want a meaningful relation then you need to cut this guy loose. It is clear that he doesn’t want a relationship with you. He is just not that into you. He keeps coming back for sex and sometimes to reinvestigate to see if something meaningful can come out of your passion together. He still gets the vibe that you are not the one and he moves on again. Rest assure he will keep coming back until one day; he disappears for good when he has found the woman of his dreams.

     Relationships with unpredictable men leave women drained and unhappy.  If a woman s in love with him because her life is in a constant pause and limbo for this man who leaves and re-enters her life at will.    The best thing to do is to confront him. Ask him why he keeps disappearing and resurfacing. Tell him you cannot do this anymore.  You will be hurt but you will meet someone else who won’t pick you up like a lost toy and then drop you as quick as a bad habit.

      If you do not want to get verbal with him, you can simply tell him no when he calls out of the blue moon to hook up.  You stop taking his calls and refuse to meet up with him.  You cannot expect a man to be responsible for your happiness. What I do know about men is that if they somehow think you have no problem giving away yourself for nothing, they will take and take and take. It’s called high opportunity. Defuse this situation and dump Mr. Unpredictable. If he is insecure about relationships, you cannot wait for his confidence to grow or for him to grow up.  if he is having commitment issues that something he needs to sort out on his own, you should not have to suffer with him.

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2 Responses to “Dealing with Mr. Unpredictable”
  1. LoveDoctor Says:

    Tell me about it. This is the most frustrating thing guys do to women. There are a lot of men who do this. It doesn’t matter if you are the most beautiful woman or the most ugliest. What women need to do is to be more challenging and not give it up so quickly so that way guys can respect you more. I think that every guy wants and is ready to have a relationship. the problem is that the emotionally unavailable is a cop out excuse so they can have their cake and eat it too. I also claim to be emotionally unavailable when I come across guys who I am not interested in pursuing anything with. Excellent write.

  2. Jimmy Shilaho Says:

    And what about unpredictable ladies? Women like moaning about male unpredictability when at times they contribute.


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