The Urban Cougar: Not Your Average Kitty

She is sleek, powerful and beautiful.  She is also deadly, predatory and dangerous.  Always stalking her prey with unrelenting patience and skill, she doesn’t stop until she gets what she wants.  Who is this seductive temptress?  You may ask.  Of course, I speak of the urban Cougar, the fiercest of the jungle feline.  Since the airing of the ABC comedy series “Cougar Town” starring the beautiful, funny Courtenay Cox as sexy older neighbor Jules, I began to wonder if use of the word “Cougar” is more empowering to single forty-plus women, or if it is a detriment. 

As a woman who is proud of reaching the age of 40, I can’t help but still feel like a young, desirable woman still in her twenties.  Back in those earlier, carefree days, labeling the mature, single woman after the powerful mountain cat somehow rendered her to be nothing more than an older, desperately oversexed woman who would devour one hot, young stud after another as they innocently wandered into her neck of the jungle.  She was something to both be marveled and feared; a man eater with insatiable blood lust and sexual appetite to match.   

I am wondering now, at this age, if we haven’t stereotyped older single women unfairly.

While our male counterparts are cheered on and praised for their desire to date young, beautiful women, the cougar should also be commended for her prowess for hot, young boy toys; giving little worry to what others around her may think. 

I think it’s time for older, vibrant women to reclaim the word, and be proud of their cougar status.

With the divorce rate climbing ever higher, there are more cougars on the prowl than ever before.  Expect to see an upsurge of older, financially stable, attractive women ready to compete in the love market.  Of course, antiquated notions still exist in this world, and will probably exist until the end of time but I still think that the Cougar is someone to be admired; a woman who doesn’t allow her age to get in the way of her happiness.  I think it’s fabulous that sexy, powerful women can step out and feel proud of whom they are, not allowing the old double standard to interfere with their happiness.  

In the celebrity world, we see dozens of examples of gorgeous, older stars dating younger actors.

I think of Cameron Diaz with Justin Timberlake, and legendary star Demi Moore dating adorable Ashton Kutcher. 

Reaching the age of forty wasn’t nearly as difficult as I thought it would be.  In many ways, I am a better woman than I was in my twenties.  I am intelligent, experienced and independent.  I don’t need a man to define who I am, or what I do.  I can see why some younger guys would feel compelled to come to us, a refreshing change from needy, insecure younger women.  I should know, because I was once one of them.  Suffice it to say, modern times allows us cougars to leave our homes on a Friday night, dress into our sexiest little black dress, and enjoy ourselves as much as anyone else would.  That, in itself is the most empowering thing of all.   All that is left to say is, Happy Hunting, gals!  

As the roles between men and women blur in our society, so do the dating rules.  Older women put themselves out as being sexy, independent and just as worthy of happiness as anyone else.  She is sure of herself, knows how to flirt, and uses her beauty, intelligence and sophistication to land her next man.  On the flip side, despite what society tells us, young men also enjoy dating older women.  Many young men aptly named “cougar hunters” actively seek out these sleek jungle cats.  Their reasons of seeking out older female partners may vary according to who you speak to;   Some men say that the attraction of the cougar lies less in her confidence, and more in her wallet.  Many cougars have established careers, own their own homes, Mercedes, and have few emotional ties.  The man who is on the search for a woman with money could also be the cougar hunter, the victim suddenly becoming the predator.  The laws of the concrete jungle are always changing and reinventing themselves to suit the needs of those who dwell within its glistening towers.