Ten Gross Behaviors That Your Boyfriend Displays

Let’s face it, your boyfriend is uncouth and in desperate need of a course in proper respect and manners. Here is a list of ten gross behaviors from your boyfriend:

1. During your piano recital, your boyfriend takes out his cell phone and starts talking loudly to his buddy
2. Your boyfriend takes you to the worst restaurant possible. He calls this “his place.” He stuffs his mouth full of hamburger and French fries. You can see ketchup dripping from his chin. He then blows his nose in a dirty napkin and asks you to throw it away.
3. Your boyfriend starts scratching his butt in public. He doesn’t keep his zipper all the way up. When he walks, you can hear fart sounds from the back of his pants.
4. Your boyfriend picks his nose at a concert. He sneezes in your face. He tells you that he is sick but that he is not contagious. He then passes out on your lap.
5. Your boyfriend spends hour after hour talking about his anatomy. He pulls on his ring nose. He marvels at his multi-color hair. And best of all, he gives you a ring that he made out of his earwax.
6. Your boyfriend sings off key in a fine restaurant. He insults the waitress, the cook, and the manager. He shouts obscenities and gives everyone the finger. He then asks you to pay the bill.
7. Your boyfriend invites all his college friends to your house to watch the big game. Most of the snacks land on your new carpet. Your boyfriend smokes and crushes his cigarette on your fancy oriental rug.
8. Your boyfriend announces in a movie theater that he has to take a leak. When he comes back, he has a huge box of popcorn. He doesn’t share the popcorn with you, but he insists that you hold it.
9. Your boyfriend kisses you like you were a lobster. He starts making strange gurgling sounds. He chews gum like a cow. In the middle of the night, he pants like a dog. He insists that you get him a doggie biscuit.
10. Your boyfriend walks into your house with muddy boots. He does not take his boots off. He tracks mud all over your carpet. He apologizes for his ill manners, but then knocks over your precious vase while showing you his new break dance moves.