He’s Just Not That Into You

January 15, 2009 by Holly Jayne  
Published in Dating

We all wonder if the guy we just gone on a date with likes us or not and if there is any chance of a future let alone another date. Instead of the typical, here are signs he’s interested, I’m going to let you know about signs that tell he’s just not that into you.

We all wonder if the guy we just gone on a date with likes us or not and if there is any chance of a future let alone another date. Instead of the typical, here are signs he’s interested, I’m going to let you know about signs that tell he’s just not that into you. It’ll save you a lot of hassle and worrying about what he’s thinking or what’s going on, etc. Often these signs are obliviant to you but everyone else around you can see that it’s not working out…he just doesn’t like you the way you like him. The following should be quite helpful when you begin deciphering what’s going on.

Every woman during her dating years will experience this. So don’t feel like you’re the only one wondering about what’s up with that guy you have an eye on. This situation is just leaving you ever so confused and worked up and worried and its better that you just let it be and move on with life. Like the saying goes, there are many fish in the sea, so throw him back and fish for another. Believe me, you’ll soon find that one who will show you that he cares and wants to have a future with you and it’ll leave you just amazed.

Here are some signs to look for from this person of interest to find if there may be anything worth having with him or should you move on…. Read on to find out if your man of interest has any of the following going on….

The most obvious signs that he’s definitely not interested are that he avoids eye contact, his body is always positioned away from you, he keeps his arms folded tightly over his chest, nor does he encourage any type of conversation with you and he don’t tell you about himself. He keeps a distance between you and him… He doesn’t try to get close.

A huge red flag that this dude isn’t right for you and that you should definitely move on is that he ignores and disrespects you. He does this by putting down your values, thoughts and ideas. It shows that he doesn’t care about you. You’re definitely worth more than that, so don’t put up with him. Don’t think that oh I’ll stick with him because he’ll eventually change. The thing is he will NEVER change. Do you want that to be your wakeup call 5 years down the road? I think not. Don’t waste your time on a guy who does such things. There is definitely someone much better for you out there.

Another huge sign is that he’ll cancel plans on you last minute or even stands you up. He may just entirely blow you off or even shows up late. If you were really worth it in his eyes or was someone he was actually interested in, he wouldn’t do that to you. These things show that he does not respect you and don’t care if you are even in his life or not. Honey, just move on and let this guy go. There are other guys who will actually cherish you and be thankful that you are in their life.

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14 Responses to “He’s Just Not That Into You”
  1. thestickman Says:

    Living here in multi-cultural Toronto, CANADA we see all sorts of this; recently while at a Second Cup coffee house, my wife and I were enjoying coffee while this ‘couple’ seated close by were also. Mr. was on a cellphone, speaking rather loudly and in Polish (which clearly his girlfriend did not speak a word of) that “…no, she’s just a fling. I’m using her until I get bored. Yeah, really. Oh she’s cute and all but it’s just ‘a fling’ for me, I don’t intended to get serious blah-blah-blah…’ and she is sitting *RIGHT THERE* next to him!! Oh he was smiling and winking and stroking her hand and stuff, but his cocky smug over-confidence was stifling. -What a SNAKE! :( I almost wanted to inform the lady~du-jour that she was just target-practice for this moron and she should dump him.

  2. CHAN LEE PENG Says:

    Interesting read!

  3. Holly Jayne Says:

    Thank you thestickman for your story! That is so sad that these kinds of things are so common. Hearing this, makes you wish that people would just grow up and treat people fairly and with respect. I have a couple friends whose boyfriends treat them like crap and we can see all the warning signs but they just hope he’ll change so they stay with them….

  4. Holly Sendy Says:

    Thank you chan lee peng for your comment. Glad you found it to be interesting.

  5. Kelly Says:

    Interesting article. It’s sad how people often turn a blind eye to these things and/or think the person they are with can change. More often than not, they won’t change. Wish people in these situations would realise that they deserve so much better.

  6. Holly Sendy Says:

    Thanks Kelly for your comment! I agree with what you said. People really do deserve so much more than what these situations give….

  7. Steve M Says:

    Very interesting article. You did a good job discussing this topic. I can’t imagine how or why a man would ever want to treat a woman like that. They should be happy that they found someone that enjoys being with them and is interested in having some type of future with them. Thanks for bringing an awareness to this issues that still takes place, but is often hidden from view.

  8. Holly Jayne Says:

    Thanks Steve for your comments! What’s sad is that even if the woman knows that this is going on, they are afraid of being alone and they just put up with it. Honestly, I don’t get it. I know of a girl in such a situation and it’s sad and she won’t listen and just stays with him and gets treated like crap. People in these situations need to realize that they are worth more than that and deserve so much better. They should not be afraid of being single. Aren’t people often told to enjoy the single years because those are when you have the most fun?!

  9. Jan Says:

    I totally agree with you Holly. Very great article!!!

  10. Holly Sendy Says:

    Thanks Jan!

  11. Debra C. Says:

    Thank you for the article. One big one I notice is when he never calls back after the first date, or calls perhaps once a week following the date. Good points.

  12. Holly Jayne Says:

    Thanks Debra! That’s definitely something girls should keep in mind as well. Thanks for reminding us :-)

  13. K Says:

    I agree with Holly’s comment that most of time, even if the woman knows the man is a player, they are afraid of being alone and therefore, just put up with it. And from my observations, most of the time, these guys know how to treat their women “well” (except for the fact that they(guys) are just playing with them(women)). I believe other factors come into play too. The current individualistic and open culture of today’s society may further promote this kind of “fling” relationships.

  14. Holly Jayne Says:

    Thanks K. I do have to agree with your statement about todays society/culture playing a part in promoting such relationships. In the majority of movies and other medias we see people having flings, one night stands, player relationships, cheating, etc. And I think that the more we see this stuff being portrayed in the media, the more we are going to see it happen to those around us. People sometimes have that kind of thinking that if it’s on tv or being done in a movie, that it’s ok to do… It’s sad how much media shapes our culture.

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