Broken Courtship is Better Than Broken Marriage

November 1, 2008 by DEACON CANDID  
Published in Dating

Know who you are getting married to.

A successful marriage is created by two people, a man and a woman who loves each other and is prepared to work hard to preserve and protect their marriage. The keyword here is, two people, it takes two to make marriage work.

No man or woman can love an unwilling spouse enough to make him/her commit to their marriage.the love, commitment, loyalty, fidelity etc must be given willingly and this is the lesson that can be derived from courtship.

Courtship is not the same as marriage, no matter how long the courtship last. The sole reason for courtship is to find out whether you are compatible with the person you are dating and if you find out that the two of you are incompatible, you must break up the relationship immediately. The fact that a courtship ends in marriage does not mean that it is successful.

A courtship is successful if you find out that you are compatible and then marry each other or if you find out that two of you are incompatible, you break up the relationship, thereby freeing each other to continue the search for the right partner.

If during courtship, a couple discovers that they are incompatible and one partner cajoles the other person not to break up the relationship or one person decides to manage the other person, it will be extremely difficult for them to have a good marriage. Marriage will not erase incompatibility rather it will magnify it!

The same reasons why courtship should have ended are the same reasons why the marriage will end.

I also want to advice that people should not go into marriage with a desire to change the other person. Before marriage, you have to accept the other person for whom he/she is and if you honestly have to change the person before you can have a good marriage, then he/she is not the right one for you. Also, while it is very important that the family of the person you are dating likes you, you must remember that you are not marrying his/her family. If his/her family loves you but the person does not, the marriage will not work, is as good as a dead rat.

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One Response to “Broken Courtship is Better Than Broken Marriage”
  1. chinos Says:

    Deacon, u are one in a million among writers of our time.
    keep it up

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