10 More Signs You Should Dump Your Boyfriend

December 6, 2009 by Angelita DeBois  
Published in Dating

A follow-up to “10 Signs You Should Dump Your Boyfriend”.

A little over a year ago, I wrote an article title “10 Signs You Should Dump Your Boyfriend” and the response to it has been overwhelming. I had no idea that there are so many bad relationships out there. After reading some of the comments, I finally decided to do a follow-up article with some additional signs you should look out for.

1.       He doesn’t talk about a future with you.

I had a boyfriend once that was very good on paper. Respectful, employed, relatively handsome, OK lover…but he never wanted to discuss a possible future together beyond making dinner reservations. Later, when he dumped me, I realized the reason he didn’t want to discuss a future; he didn’t see one. A valuable lesson was learned by all involved.

2.       You’ve never met his close friends/family members.

If he’s met your mother, cousin and hairstylist and you’ve yet to meet anyone he knows…that’s a problem. People who are important in your life at least know the existence of each other. If you still have yet to meet anyone he cares about, it’s because you are just not important enough to warrant such an introduction. And if you aren’t important to him, what kind of relationship do you really have?

3.       He’s changed from when you were first dating; for the worse.

I see this in the comments for “10 Signs You Should Dump Your Boyfriend” all the time: he was so sweet when we first started dating but now he’s changed. I asked a couple of guy friends of mine about this phenomenon and you know what they said? They said that most guys put on a gentleman front when they first start dating because the real man underneath would have women running for the doors. Would you date a man again if you met for the first date and he treated you like so much dirt? The real person you care about only reveals himself, slowly over time. He was never that nice to begin with; just good at covering his bad habits.

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17 Responses to “10 More Signs You Should Dump Your Boyfriend”
  1. clay hurtubise Says:

    Lucky me! My boyfriend and I have been together 14 years, and at this rate at least another 14!
    Thanks,
    Clay

  2. Authoress Terry E. Lyle Says:

    You’re absolutely correct!

  3. Claire Says:

    So true! I’ve recently ended a relationship of 4 years (we lived together for 3) because I found myself feeling unhappy every day and my boyfriend didn’t seem to notice (or care). When I tried to talk to him about things he was dismissive.

    I asked him where he saw our relationship going and he didn’t seem to think it NEEDED to be going anywhere and said he didn’t know what he wanted. It was a heartbreaking decision for me to end it but at 30 years old I felt I needed to be with someone who really loved me and wanted to be with me.

    I could identify with nearly all of the points made in your previous article and a couple in this one article and am now sure I made the right decision.

  4. catlord Says:

    Correct!
    I wrote some articles (with cartoon illustrations) showing when things go the right way (I won’t link-drop here though)

    Nice article. :-)

  5. Joie Schmidt Says:

    Really good advice.

    Blessings.

    Sincerely,

    -Liane Schmidt.

  6. Reilley Says:

    Good advice on all counts.

  7. a woman Says:

    this is only to be said with the utmost affection and with a nice loving hug….i love you…..

    (because you confirmed most of my feelings and validated my reasons for leaving my marriage of 8 years to a man that i have loved like no other)

  8. Kassi Says:

    I think your article helped…honestly, I do.

    I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half now, and I feel alone every single day of my life.(And we are constantly not even 30 feet away from one another.)

    He can’t seem to put down the X-Box controlled for five minutes,when it involves spending time with me, or doing anything sexual; It’s gotten to the point where I have to beg for that, too.

    I cry and he ignores me, I have a nervous breakdown and he thinks it’s hilarious…

    I think it may be time to end things.
    The only problem is…

    I don’t know how.

  9. Ayasha Says:

    The ‘relationship’ I am in has every sign in this article. It hasn’t been long since I’ve known him but I’ve given him so much because I wanted to show him that I would treat him so well after he told me that his ex had cheated on him.

    When we first started seeing eachother he made me feel so special, like no one had ever made me feel before (initially I wasn’t into him) and then, when I finally told him that I felt for him, he suddenly changed. Even though it was him who kept telling me he “wants to call me his girlfriend”.

    I wanted him to end this thing so I can have closure but after reading this article I have realised that I need to have the strength to end it myself. I just don’t know if I can do it.

  10. yirna Says:

    …I may have googled this article. Thanks for the advice.

  11. Joshua Says:

    You can never tell who you are with in the first month. that is why it is so weird to see people get married so quick. I still find out shocking things about my significant other. She told me we had only 200 text messages a month, and just last week, after 4 years on a shared cell plan, she confessed we had unlimited, and she had been lying about that!! It such a weird thing to lie about, but thats the point, you really find out more and more about a person as time goes on, so give it a bit of time.

  12. Haleh Hajebian Says:

    I NEED HELP PLEASEEE!
    so my bf and i have only been together for almost 3 months, and in the beginning of the relationship he was super sweet and he would always text/call me, and now, we barely text anymore and he doesn’t call as much anymore.
    we still have fun when we’re together, but when we’re not, he doesn’t text/call like i want him to.
    what should i do?
    oh and he still talks to his ex gf…..

  13. tab Says:

    a HUGE laugh to number 10, cause that’s exactly what I did! =P

  14. Madison Parker Says:

    Good for you! Young women need to read the signs and get out while the gettin’s good!
    Shay Davidson writing as Madison Parker

  15. Ava Says:

    Lol at the comment with him being your boyfriend 14 years blank stare. Hope he has a will if he dies cause a girlfriend and common law marriage doesn’t stand up in court.

  16. kristina390 Says:

    absolutely true. never let anyone treat you like dirt. deep down inside you know what you deserve, and if it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. excellent article. i also laughed at #10. :)

  17. sad & confused Says:

    i am in need of advice. i have been with my bf for seven years and we have one child together, and live together, but we are on the verge or breaking up. i told him i need more affection and he said that i always say that and it is the same fight all the time. i told him it is the same fight bc he never shows me more affection. he told me that he is who he is and i can take it or leave it….so basically he would rather leave me than show me more love….is he even worth it? should i stay with him for the sake of my child? i feel so confused….


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