Woman Abuse

30% of women presenting with injuries to the emergency department had injuries caused by battering.

http://www.asafeplaceforhelp.org/batteredwomenstatistics.html

What Constitutes as Abuse?

“Abuse is a pattern of behavior in which physical violence and/or emotional coercion is used to gain or maintain power or control in a relationship. A single incident of assault also constitutes abuse.” (http://www.communitysafety.utoronto.ca/assistance/abusive/abuseDefinition.htm)

Abuse can be physical, mental, and emotional. It ranges from mild to severe; however, all cases of abuse are unacceptable.

How Common is Abuse?

There are statistics available all over the internet with calculated numbers of victims of abuse, but the truth is that no one really knows how many people are abused. Statistics can only be taken from reported/discovered issues of abuse, which may actually be a very scary thing.

What a lot of people don’t realize is that it’s not only women who are victims of domestic abuse. This misconception comes from the fact that men are less apt to report being abused by a spouse or significant other than a woman is, usually for fear of not being believed or of being laughed at. This double standard is the reason why hundreds of men live in fear every day.

Why Abuse?

There are many theories behind why someone would be an abuser, the most common being the issue of control. Abusers often feel like they have more power and more control over the person whom they are hurting. Think about the childhood bully at school (even if it was you). Was he/she often very cocky, eager to put on a show for a crowd, and hurtful physically and mentally?

The same concept applies to adult abusers.

Why do Victims stay with the Abuser?

Fear.

It may be difficult to accept this fact, but it is the main reason why a victim will not leave an abusive partner/relative/friend. Here are some fears that a victim may experience:

• fear of being alone
• fear of failure (what if the abuser was “right”?)
• fear of the law
• fear that the law won’t protect them (the victim)
• fear of having nowhere to live/nothing to eat
• fear of future repercussions

If Someone is being Abused, what Should They do?

Tell someone – anyone. Don’t suffer alone. Fear is a powerful thing, but it must be overcome; a lifetime of abuse just isn’t worth it. Reporting the abuser is also very important. If the abuser hurts his/her victim once, reporting him/her will put the issue on file. This will help to escalate the process of arresting and charging the abuser if there are future incidents, whether the incident be more abuse of the original victim or of a new victim.

Another good idea is to try to secure a “safe place” that the abuser won’t be able to readily access. It’s true that sometimes (often) the abuser will not let go of the victim and may follow the victim with the intent of doing more harm.

Remember, your fear isn’t silly, and abuse is not a small issue, even if it’s not physical. Nobody deserves to be abused, and no one should stand for it.