Buy a Cape? No, Thanks

November 18, 2010 by AdieRose  
Published in Fashion

Fashion doomed to fail.

There was an article published in my broadsheet of choice yesterday, in which a fashion editor was wondering why no one had gone out a bought capes when they were told to.

I had to laugh.

Said article goes on for three pages, highlighting all the trends ignored by the public during the last season. It seems that we went for parkas over capes (because you can actually wear parkas, like, out), hats over elbow length gloves (duh), and trousers over maxi dresses.

Now I don’t know about you, but if I happened to stroll through town dressed in a cape and/or elbow length gloves, I would get mugged. Which would be exactly what I deserved for going out dressed like a ninny.

High fashion is art, and so is it possibly a bit unrealistic to expect what happens on the catwalk to be entirely reflected on the high street – maxi dresses look great on tall women who are built like willow trees, they do not look great on women like me, who didn’t quite make it to 5′3 and couldn’t be described as willowy. By anyone. Capes are great if you were born quite a long time ago, sort of cerca 1750 really, but not practical now. Can you imagine struggling to the bus stop with your hands full of shopping, unable to see where you were going because your new Primark cape had just blown up round your face, like one of those collars for dogs who’ve had operations.

No. Thanks for all the laughs fashion week, but I think we public do know what we’re talking about. Sometimes. Unless you’ve been featured on walmart.com, in which case you don’t have a clue.

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