What are The Advantages and Disavantages of Being The Oldest Child

April 26, 2011 by oncewantobeawriter  
Published in Family

Being an eldest child in the family is somehow desirable, but a heavy load to some who are into it.

I, myself is an oldest child. Definitely there are several advantages and disadvantages of being the Oldest Child.

In a Biblical view,being a first born is very important. There are special privileges and advantages that belong to the oldest child. Also, the first born allotted a double portion of inheritance and the judicial authority from his father.

I will share my own views and opinion of being the Oldest Child. We are seven in our family that grow up together.Five of them are my siblings on my mother side.I have one sister on my father’s side (second family).But the Pros and Cons depends and varies on how the parents brought up their children. And each of us has a different definition because of our different experiences in life. 

Pros:

Born with Love - I am not saying that other siblings were not born with love but usually the first born is the fruit of the first love, true love and fiery love. If you are born under the wed-lock (even not), your birth date  is the most awaited moment of your parents and other family members. The  first born, were usually filled with love, attention and care. All things are new. From infant clothes, shoes, toys, mattresses, etc.It seems like you are “first” in everything. 

Gain Respect - As an oldest child you gain respect from your younger siblings. They always consider your ideas and thoughts before making any final decision in family issues.

Opportunity Opportunity seems clearer and more for the first born especially if the parents were prepared when they got married. Opportunity in education, travel, parent’s attention and love.

Cons

Guarded - We all know that having a first child is a new experience for a couple. So, they tend to look after their child, if possible 24 hours a day. Since, you get all the attention of your parents sometimes you feel like you don’t have much freedom at all and always guarded. 

Responsibility - As the oldest child, you are expected to be a model to your younger siblings and it is not an easy task. If you grown in a poor family, you are in-charge with them. I used to look after my brothers at the very early age. Prepared their milk, giving them bath and put them to sleep. Bad thing is, if there’s something happen to them ” it’s your fault”.  Now, some of us were already adult but I am still in-charge with almost everything. A kind of family problem solver. 

Hardship - As an Oldest child i experienced all the hardships that sometimes I can’t imagine how I went through it. If your parents married at their early age you are a “doll” to them. They commit mistakes but yet learning. Part of those mistakes are how to taking care of you or how to raise you. 

Based on my childhood experienced, the Cons weighed much than Pros. I do all the work in most part. From cooking to laundry, to taking care of my younger siblings and pasturing the carabaos. “No Time To Play” with the other children as I had my brother clinging in my waist like a monkey. I need to wake up early in the morning to prepare myself for school because my mother is attending my little brother. On the other hand, being the oldest child shaped and made me to be responsible almost in everything. It is somehow a nice feeling that your younger siblings is looking at your footprints. If you love them, you need to be a good model. When I was in High School, I always keep some money from my allowance and buy some bread for them. They are always happy every time I came home from school. For me, being the oldest child is a continuous responsibility wherein  in some point I am disabling them to stand with their own. When I get married my husband thought me on how to help them in other way. I am happy of what I learned and being unchained from the responsibility that belongs to my parents.

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16 Responses to “What are The Advantages and Disavantages of Being The Oldest Child”
  1. CHIPMUNK Says:

    Me too the eldest child and definitely a handful of responsibilities

  2. oncewantobeawriter Says:

    Hi Chipmunk – really? we are the same…hehe. I guess, we can both relate on how it feels like…Thanks for posting…God bless…

  3. Guy Hogan Says:

    I was the oldest son and because my mother depended on me to help with all my younger brothers and sisters I learned to cook, iron clothes, do laundry and clean house. It was a good education. My older sister got married very young and left home. But I do understand that you lose some of your childhood when you must take on adult responsibilities so young.

  4. Ruby Hawk Says:

    I am also the oldest child, my oldest son tells me it’s hardest to be the oldest, my second son tells me it’s hardest to be second, and my youngest child says it hardest to be the youngest, so I don’t know if it matters where you come in.

  5. Macherie Says:

    I dont think the hirearchy matters as long as children are treated equally by the parents. The advantage of being the oldest is you get to bully the youngers ones… lol.

  6. oncewantobeawriter Says:

    @ Guy – I understand too how you feel. It is seldom that the oldest son incharge with the household chore, I salute you for doing so….Thanks for dropping by..God bless

  7. oncewantobeawriter Says:

    @ Ruby – That’s a nice, plain and equal comments from your children…They have a point…

    @ Mach – hehe..you got it….at gawin silang utusan..just kidding. God bless

  8. papaleng Says:

    Pinsan or papamangkin, whatever the right term maybe, just want to clarrify on one issue. Sa bible ang binibigyan doon na emphasis about the eldesst is Lalake, not Babae. kaya ang burden sa traditional Jewish family lies on the eldest son, regardless kung pang-ilan siya .. And yes, I can relate sa situation mo, eldest din ako sa pito. Mahirap na masarap. Kapag tumanda ka pa at mawala na ang tatay mo, ikaw ang tatayong Tatay sa family..

  9. Edsss Says:

    I am the eldest too ate, among 7…

  10. micCyrus Says:

    Nice Article!!

  11. arielcnacion Says:

    masaya ako sa pagiging eldest. they trusted me and me decisions. tama ka, sa childhood minsan mas madami ung cons sa pros, pero paglaki na natin, mas naeenjoy na natin ang liberty na dala nito. =)

  12. SharifaMcFarlane Says:

    Being the oldest child does take away some of the fun of childhood.

  13. juliachild Says:

    Thanks for sharing

  14. juliachild Says:

    Thanks for sharing…

  15. oncewantobeawriter Says:

    Thank you all for leaving a comment on this article…

    @ Papz – Yes, I agree..:)

  16. fariha safdar Says:

    em also the eldest child…
    but i enjoyed alot by fulfill my responsiblities
    my all youngest sis are too close to me…


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