Stretch Marks: A Rant

I sit here five and a half months pregnant with my second child as my first child is playing with his pretzels from dinner. I just have to vent about something that I keep seeing as I try to find some homeopathic or similar non-medicinal relief for my pregnancy related discomfort. I’m sure that many of the other mothers and women who are pregnant right now are tired of the many, many ads that tell us our stretch marks are unsightly.

Perhaps it is just my own little odd perception of the world but I have a deep sense of pride in the changes that have taken place with my first and (now) my second pregnancies. They’re visible evidence of the heroic effort that I took on to carry and birth my children. It may not sound like much to many people because we’re encouraged to view pregnancy as a novelty. Society covers up the danger and the exhausting effort that comes with being pregnant.

Working mothers know just how hard it is to keep up the daily duties and chores that came with life before pregnancy. I have the good fortune of being able to stay home for this pregnancy but it’s still exhausting because I have a toddler running around now. Sure, it could be argued that we chose this but our choice is not something that we should be scorned for. As much as I hate to say it, women who are pregnant are getting scorned.

The stretch marks, weight gain, mood swings, morning sickness, and labor pains are all the butt of jokes, snide comments, and subtle cuts from the advertising companies. The implication that my stretch marks are ugly is offensive. It not only implies that pregnancy is ugly but that the pregnancy is some how wrong because it is ‘ugly’. The same can be said for the weight gain and other visible changes that come along when you’re pregnant and during the postpartum period.

Mood swings, morning sickness and labor pains have also been made the butt of jokes and treated as though they’re due to some form of horrible illness. Yes, they’re uncomfortable and labor can be down right hellish, but this does not mean that pregnant women are afflicted with some plauge. When we’re encouraged to hide the challenges that come with pregnancy because other people in society get uncomfortable (like telling a curious child that we swallowed a basketball rather then that we’re carrying a baby), we’re encouraged to think that there is something some how wrong with us.

As ugly as we can feel at times and as horrible as we can feel at times because of pregnancy (mainly those surging hormones), we’re not some hideous thing to be hidden away from society. Pregnant women are just as beautiful as non-pregnant women. And the changes that come with pregnancy, I believe, enhance our beauty. Strech marks are uncomfortable but they fade to a silvery sheen that can glimmer quite beautifully. The curveatous figure that we have after pregnancy attests that we are not only mature women but that we are goddesses of fertility wrapped within a human body.

Don’t be ashamed of those leaky breasts or the quick to flow tears, gals. It’s a testament to how wonderful and wonderous we are. It’s also a sign of how needed we are as well, because those little babies that society focuses so much on with pregnancy (and makes it seem to only be a few short months from conception to birth for some reason) wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for us. You’ve given birth at great risk to yourselves.

Be proud of that and celebrate your femininity. If you want to get rid of the stretch marks, do it because you don’t want them not because society tells you that you’re now ugly. If you want to lose the weight from pregnancy, do it because it makes you healthier and it is what you want. Let’s make every day Mother’s Day and celebrate our pregnancies and the other wonderful things that come with being women.