So What is The Difference Between Being in a Relationship vs.. Being Married?

October 17, 2009 by Hyneman  
Published in Marriage

I know this subject sounds funny, but when doing my marriage classes some people think since they been together for a couple of years or live together with children, their automatically married…well let me tell you the difference.

It is sad for women to give so much of themselves in a relationship and the man won’t marry them. He get all of the benefits like you cooking, cleaning, paying bills and giving him sex without being married. He loves it because he isn’t making the commitment to you. That is why some men don’t want you to go to church because the pastor might be teaching on “shacking” or living toghther before marriage. That guy might be afraid that the pastor teaching might make her feel convicted and she wants to change. The last thing the boyfriend wants to hear from her is “we can’t do this anymore.” He is thinking no one is going to take my “bread and butter from me.”

So what is the difference? When you are married, you make that commitment before God and the pastor. You have all legal rights to marriage and is reconized as legally married so if anything goes wrong, as a spouse you have access to everything. There are benefits to marriage, statistics show that children do better in school and more likely to finish college when the children parents are married. Financially you and your family are better off and all of the income generated stays in one household. Regardless of today’s society, marriage is still more secure than just “playing house.”

Being “in a relationship” and living together is dangerous. Who is going to stop him or her from cheating on eachother? Any given day of the week that person can up and leave without no attachments. I have heard of stories where couples (not married) have bought property together and 1 year later, he found someone else and left her with the kids and the bills. When you don’t make him wait until marriage he loses respect for you too. Why should he respect you when he get everything for free from you? In my own personal story, my old ex girlfriend (we used to live together) found out that I was getting married and and she was furious! She asked me “why are you going to marry her, you only knew her for six months and we were together for two years and we didn’t get married, why?” My response was “my fiancee made me wait for sex (until we got married) and we were not living together.”   

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3 Responses to “So What is The Difference Between Being in a Relationship vs.. Being Married?”
  1. naughty beaver Says:

    Being “in a relationship” and living together is dangerous. Who is going to stop him or her from cheating on each other?

    Very weak – It doesn’t matter if someone is married or not, if they want to cheat they are going to cheat. “Dangerous”… should people who are in a relationship and living together get better health insurance? What kind of danger are we talking about?

  2. Hyneman Says:

    Are you currently living with someone you are not married to? Sounds like i hit a nerve…

  3. 8Shei8 Says:

    An interesting point of view! I do agree with Naughty Beaver, people do and will cheat regardless if they are married or in relationship.


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