Divorce is a Necessary Evil

February 1, 2013 by Janelle Coulton  
Published in Marriage

Three deal-breakers that will destroy the best marriage.

Just to be clear from the outset; I do not believe in divorce. I have written umpteen articles and essays on this topic. However, divorce is a legal right to every married person because there are some circumstances that arise in a marriage which make divorce necessary, and in some cases mandatory. I call these reasons the three A’s.


1. Abuse


When there is any kind of abuse happening in a marriage, whether it be physical, verbal or emotional, then divorce needs to be seriously considered. Is the abuser in the marriage aware that they have a problem and need help or do they think it okay to hit their spouse or call them names. In the case of physical abuse; this is a matter of person safety, and the marriage needs to end. It is no longer healthy, and will never be unless serious, intensive conselling is sought and obtained. Mental and verbal abuse is just as damaging; sometimes more so, as the memory of horrible things been said; stay with us forever.

Whether you are male or female and believe me there are many men who are abused both verbally, emotionally and physically, but studies show that women are more likely to be the victims of abuse in a marriage or relationship. You only have to look around the number of women’s refuges and shelters that are available to help women escaping from abusive spouses. When you compare this number to accommodations for men in the same situation, there is more help available to women.

Staying in a marriage that is abusive to your and your children (if you have children) is unhealthy and dangerous. Your children should not have to live in such an environment. My grandmother left an abusive marriage in 1958, when divorce was taboo, she had four children; aged from sixteen to about eight years old. If there had been more help out there for women in the 1950’s, I feel sure she would have left sooner.

2. Addiction


Is your spouse suffering from an addiction to alcohol, drugs, gambling which is impacting on your marriage? Does their addiction affect the harmony in your household? It is very unlikely that if your spouse has a serious addiction that the marriage would be happy. Usually the hardest thing with any addicts is getting them to admit that they have a problem. The fear of having to address to addiction is too much to bear for some addicts. However if your spouse is willing to get help, to get off the drink or drugs or to stop gambling then there is hope for your marriage.

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One Response to “Divorce is a Necessary Evil”
  1. afaceristonline Says:

    very interesting post .thanks for share

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