Common Misconceptions About Marriage, Part Two

July 18, 2013 by Gary Davis  
Published in Marriage

This continue the article on marriage myths.

This part two of this topic.

Another myth about marriage is that it is easy. After all, if dating was fun and effortless, doesn’t it make sense that being married will just be more of the same? No. It is one thing to date and then return to your respective homes. It is an entirely different thing to have to stay together and face unpleasant issues such as debt, neighbors, and family problems. Marriage is the hardest thing a person can ever be involved with, yet, most rewarding, but, it is far from easy.

When in a marriage, there is the myth that an abuser will change. There is the myth that money solves every problem. There is the myth that once you’re married you won’t have anything to do with the various extended families. There is the myth that a couple will feel madly in love everyday

Perhaps the biggest myth about marriage is that a couple, once married, won’t have to work on the marriage. The thinking is that, “we love each other so much we will always be close.” in other words, the marriage will just automatically sort of be self-perpetuating. The pressures of marriage do just the exact opposite; they pull you apart. Many couples get married figuring this is going to be “Nirvana”. They usually get a rude awakening.

Finally, there is a myth that says that children won’t make a difference in the relationship. I can comment on that from personal experience. Never was my life turned more upside down than when we had a child. My wife no longer just thought me; I had to put another person first, there were new financial pressures, and new things that needed to be planned for. Life won’t be the same for years. You got married to be with your spouse and children do get in the way of that.

One thing that is not a myth is that marriage is wonderful when entered into for the right reasons; with a person’s eyes wide open, and, with the right person.

Issues in marriage will ambush you. One person may want to take a job out-of-state; the other may want to stay put.

Usually the myths about marriage relate either to erroneous reasons for getting married, or what will occur when a person is married.

Like anything worthwhile, marriage requires a great deal of thought, discussion, and most importantly, time. Time clarifies. Time is the one thing that allows a person to dispel the myths, and, to evaluate the correct reasons to enter into this most wonderful relationship.

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