A Guide on How to Endure a Mother-in-law

September 6, 2013 by Spider39  
Published in Marriage

Women often feel compelled to compete for the affections of the same man in their life. This happens with many mother and son relationships either unknowingly or knowingly, and can be a huge problem when a son enters into marriage. A balanced mother-in-law will realize that her son’s marriage will bring new changes in the dynamics of his and her relationship. Ideally, a wife’s needs should take first priority over a mother’s wants. Not to say that a man can’t continue to help his mother after marriage, but a mother can’t expect her son to shirk his responsibilities to his wife to please her. All parties involved have to know what their roles are and be content with those roles as well as be flexible with what they all should share with each other: unconditional love.

  • You can’t do anything right.
  • Gives unwanted advice on clothes, how to discipline or raise your children, how top fix meals, etc.
  • Treats you like a child rather than showing you proper respect as an adult.
    Nags incessantly.
  • Comes off as the expert of any subject that’s brought up.
    Invasive of your space and time.
  • Has the need to control any situation.
  • Outright confrontations or interference in family matters.

Sometimes mothers-in-law do raise valid points when it comes to handling various situations that newlyweds go through, since they usually have more experience solving money problems, managing a household, dealing with career challenges, or adjusting to a ready made family. The key often lies with the mother-in-law allowing a newlywed couple to find their own way for when handling these matters, while being caring enough to offer  help or give advice usually when the couple directly asks for it, and are willing to receive it, for the most part.

When you’re dealing with a pushy, obnoxious mother-in-law, you don’t want to pour gasoline onto the fire by adding your own dose of sarcasm and anger to an already tense situation. Although responding in kind may seem like you’re standing up for yourself in the right way, dialogue between family members is best done when everyone is calm enough to talk things out reasonably, and shouldn’t be handled like a political debate. Various methods can be chosen that best suit your mother-in-law and circumstances.

The reality is that some daughters-in-law will never become close friends with their mothers-in-law. However, certain changes in dialogue and behavior could improve a strained relationship, especially when respect is shown by each of them toward each other. Here are five tips for getting along better with your mother-in-law.

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