June 26, 2013 by Geminieve  
Published in Beauty

I so crave affections from others and intimacy is not necesarilary SEX. I simply enjoy the companies and thrills.

     What is it?  Here is me and I quote the definition ;
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PolyamoryPolyamory (from Greek πολύ [poly], meaning “many” or “several”, and Latin amor, “love”) is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate …‎Compersion – ‎Polyfidelity – ‎List of polyamorists – ‎Terminology within polyamory
So without further a due… 
It’s not cheating when my husband knows about “most” of it, now is it?  It actually doesn’t matter what anyone thinks I just know its an exciting concept, maybe indeed a bit indulgent.   You go out with the girls, all dolled up sipping your martini with a dozen secrets to spill.  You gossip, I gossip, it’s what we do.  I enjoy the ladies time out, and I enjoy a man to go out with too.   My husband is laying beside me, snoring quite loudly, and I adore him.  He’s the be who to,d me about my ‘polyamory’ tendencies.  I tell him much, not all, but plenty more than I ought to, hmmm, perhaps.  I’m to sure if telling him every detail is necesarry nor wise.  I can’t tell him I’ve been out for a drink with the pool man already but I can tell him that we have become friends to the point we may go out, simply as friends, no sex, no sneaking around.  I wasn’t sure I’d be interested in pursuing a ‘friendship’ wit him so I had to make certain before laying it on him.  Now not only do I get to do my thing, I earn trust.  And it’s not sex, it’s holding hands, lightly flirting over a conversation, a distraction on both our ends.  My husband has the same permission slip to use too.       Aside from ‘pool man’ there was no work platonic friend who I’ve known over half my life.  It started as a rekindle of friendship, which led to ‘other things’.  We always end up distancing ourselves from each other.  It never works out long and I crave his attentions too much.  My heart wants what the heart wants and I haven’t learned to harden myself after.  My husband knows we will be in each others lives on and off until one  of us ceases to exist.  Even now we have toyed with the idea of rekindling a little, but he’s keeping his door nearly shut all the way and I’m leaving mine open almost  half way.  He has no way of driving to see me most of the time and when we do we sit in a parking lot.  I’m nearing 40.  It’s not what I call a night out.  I don’t judge.  I share.  I love what I love and its the affection of men.  I love my husband with all of my heart and he is the only one at the end of the day who I lay beside as I watch his stomach rise with each breath he takes.  It’s hard to imagine a need for more when I have the world at my fingertips.  I guess sleeping some nights doea not come so easily, but if it did, I couldn’t share.

Cupid (Photo credit: srett)

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